From left to right:
Walter Larson and wife Katie
Jim Larson and new wife Joanne
Ethel Horton, my Grandma
I am sure many of you will be surprised at how young my Mom was when she married Jim. I was 18 and living in California, so I was not able to attend the wedding and reception. It was the last family event my Grandma Horton attended. She wasn't feeling well at the reception. Shortly afterward, she was admitted to the hospital with a leaking aneurysm, and then passed away. I didn't know when I left for California that I would never see my Grandma again. The day I got married, she had me go into the bathroom with her. I thought that was odd. Then she gave me $20. and told me to save it in case I needed it for emergencies. She hinted that I wasn't to tell my new husband about it. I guess she knew I was headed for a rocky road, bless her heart. So I never saw her after that. She didn't get to see or know about my firstborn. She was a very good person and a good Grandma. I still miss her.
Yes, Mom wore a wig, I am not sure why. But I can tell you that she and Jim made quite a striking pair. When I was at Connie Geistel's wedding reception, Mom and Jim walked in wearing very nice outfits they had worn on a date. They were there to pick me up. Well, everyone's head turned. They all thought Mom and Jim were movie stars or celebrities. It was pretty neat to be able to say, "Oh, no, that's just my Mom and stepdad."
5 comments:
I really liked this blog entry. You have a way of conveying such meaning behind the words. I can tell your Grandma Horton meant a lot to you. I think one of the hardest things about losing someone unexpectedly is what you were not able to say or do, and there is that feeling that if you had known it was the last time you would see them, you would have soaked up each moment and treasured them in your heart. That is how I feel about losing Grandma Joanne. She means so much to me, and I didn't tell her so many things I wish I could have said. But I know she is in heaven, and I know that she does know, even if I couldn't tell her here on earth.
Thank you for your insightful comments, you really got the meaning behind this entry. It just seemed to me that I should have been there. Instead I have to take comfort in the fact that when people leave their bodies, they become all-knowing. Sometimes when I look back, I can't believe how I left everything and everyone that was familiar to me and moved to California, knowing the hardships that almost certainly lay ahead. But I know that $20. was her way of saying she cared about me and wanted to look out for me. BTW, I did tell your Grandma how you felt, and I know she knew. But having been there done that, I know that is not the same as being able to tell her yourself.
It's funny how time leads to wisdom and understanding. I remember not wanting to be there and wishing I were somewhere else, at that age you crave something different but you don't know what (the grass is greener). but how I charish those times and strain to recall the smell of organ stew on Christmas eve, I can still smell that hint of clorine Gramma's house used to have from some cleanser she used.
We would gather (loudly) in the living room or around the vent in the bedroom floor giggling at the things the adults used to say gathered around that big oak table where they (and we) laughed for hours, I loved the stories of youth retold by Mom, aunts and uncles, Gramma would let out a quiet chuckle and put her hand to her face as though embarassed.
When I was young I hungered for change or something big that would change our lives forever..boy did we go through changes.
Looking back I know that important things reside in details, The way Dad whistled silently and that green work outfit he always wore, I told him that his bathrobe looked like a candy cane and his old leather bedroom slippers looked like big prunes, he laughed and said "thats why I like em". Mom would bleach her uniform and hanging it out to dry before going to work, the thump-sploosh of an open tub washer and the smell of laundry detergent hanging thick in the summer air, walking to Grass lake with Aunt Zelma on warm summer nights.
Time indeed brings wisdom and understanding for the truly important things.
Yes Mom and Jim looked stunning, Mom hated her hair and wigs were in style so she wore one rather than attempting a new Doo for the wedding. The reception was great and lots of fun, I spoke to Gramma quite a while that night as she strolled outside, it was really smokey in there because the windows wouldn't open and the exauhst fans wouldn't operate. She didn't feel well so we sat outside the little log cabin VFW and talked. I replay the memories from time to time even though many years have passed I still feel a sadness, I know that things are meant to be but to lose Laura and then Dad so suddenly you wonder how can there be a loving God when a family that suffered so long in poverty must endure ever greater levels of human trial. Laura and Dad are gone, Jim is in our lives and we leave our childhood home and then Gramma dies all in three short years.
It was the end of an era for us, I thought there would always be summers in Pentwater and holidays at Gramma's house. So much joy just being together and for a few days feeling like I was part of something wonderful, I belonged, I was safe, I felt happy.
God's wisdom has made me the way I am and I am thankful but at times I wonder why was it our lot to be tested so, we are a tough bunch and I often wonder why is it necessary for God to toughen us up?
But like all things, time will reveal his wisdom for this too.
I know how it feels to know that your Grandma wouldn't hold your children, or be there on special occasions. I still mourn the fact that I mine will never will. I'm just thankful for what I was able to share with her.
Yoob..I know it was heartbreaking to go thru what you did. There is one thing about it I'm thankful for. I LOVE our family. We are special, and one of a kind. I like the way you are and I'm very thankful that you're here with us in Michigan and that the past years I've been able to get to know you and have a relationship with you.
Even though I'm jealous of your attributes :)
Yoob, your entry brought back many memories for me. You are too young to remmeber this, but Mom took Laura and I to Grandma's house when Grandpa was still alive, we had to sit still in the living room and we were scared of him. Mom told us not to talk to him or make any noise. The first shower I ever took was in Grandma's newly installed shower, I must have been about 10? I remember how the aunts always got up and helped Grandma after a meal, and one day, I realized I was old enough to help, and I offered. They said, "Sure," and handed me a dish towel. I knew my life would never be the same! Yes, I thought, or at least hoped, there would always be a Grandma's house. And when there wasn't, I hoped we could go to our Mom's. When that became difficult because of the distance, I felt I would like to be the one whose home would be a backdrop to many pleasant childhood memories. Anyway, I have also thought about what you said about our family being tested.
I think there were things that happened to Laura that weren't her fault, that damaged her deeply. When people chose to sin against her they, in a way, decided her fate. God didn't intervene, for reasons we will yet know. All I can say about our early trauma is that I once had a vision that even tragic, evil things on earth can be made menanigful and beautifu, that there is a reason, and if we could only know it, it would fill us with joy and not despair. However, I did feel picked on in a cosmic way at one time, and if you would have tried to convince me it was all for the good, I would have smashed your face in! LOL! So we do live and learn like you said.
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